By His Stripes...I am healed.

Because of what Christ did for me on the cross, I am healed! Not only from my sin and from death (which now has no power over me as a Child of God) but in every other way as well.

I received a diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis (after having several neurological problems that progressed over a two-year period) the week of my birthday a little over a year ago and that is where the biggest battle of my life started (late 2012-late 2013). I was also found to have several moderate to severe spinal problems that caused significant pain and other problems (weakness, etc.) and my asthma, which had been controlled by medication previously, had gotten worse to the point where I was put on an inhaler full-time (twice every day) because the medication no longer controlled it.

There was a two or three-month period of time where I was progressively losing strength in my legs. I had to pull myself up out of a chair by holding onto something, such as a car door or desk. If there was nothing to pull myself up out of a chair, I had to push myself up using my arm strength alone to push myself up off the chair. My legs were getting very weak to where I could no longer stand up from a seated position on my own like I normally did. I also had a harder time walking any kind of distance because it felt like my legs could give out at any time. I was afraid I was going to wake up one morning and fall to the floor, unable to get up (because of leg weakness). One time I did fall outside of the post office and I could not get up because of my leg weakness. I was thankful for the two guys outside the post office who ran to me and helped me up, because I certainly could not get up myself.

Because this was very concerning to me, I asked my pastor to anoint me with oil and pray over me for MS. He did that, and the very next day, the progressing weakness in both of my legs was completely gone!!! PRAISE GOD...for by HIS stripes I was healed! (Although I continue to be followed by my PCP for MS, which is not yet completely healed).

In October 2012, we had a special healing service at church and I was declaring that date ahead of time that God would heal the severe stiffness and pain in my entire spine that had started during that summer and progressed quickly, making getting comfortable or sleeping almost impossible. The pain was excruciating much of the time and it felt as if my spine had fused together, like the spaces in between my vertebrae were gone and my spine grew as one solid stick. Flexing and bending was getting almost impossible at that point. However, I had faith that God would heal this problem and that very same night as I slept...He did! I woke up in the middle of the night and the stiffness was 100% GONE and the pain was drastically reduced! PRAISE GOD...for by HIS stripes I was healed!

In early 2014, we had another special prayer time at church for healing. I was again anointed before praying with my Sunday school teacher and his wife, who had also had asthma for about 20 years. It brought me comfort to know that she understood at least the asthma part because she had been there! Again, I had faith that God was going to heal something that night, whether it be the asthma, the MS or the remaining spinal problems I continue with. I did not know whether God was going to heal one, two or all three of the major physical issues I have but I knew that God was going to blow my socks off again! That night, I did not use my inhaler and went to bed. Before this time, had I even missed a single dose, my wheezing got significantly worse and my cough started up again (a three-year chronic cough). I woke up the next morning and my wheezing was completely gone! It felt as if my lungs had opened up like they have never been before (I always had exercise-induced asthma before it turned chronic three years previous to this healing)!! I have not used my inhaler a single time since that day and it has been almost four months!! PRAISE GOD...for by HIS stripes I was healed!

I am walking in faith that God will continue the physical healings in my life! I believe that God finishes what He starts and boy, has He started the healing! Some days are still hard physically and I cannot do some of the things I used to do, but I am extremely thankful for all that God has already healed in my body!

I never know what to expect physically the next day or week due to the MS and remaining spinal problems, and I take one day at a time, trusting God to give me strength and grace to make it through the hard days. On the good days, I praise Him all the more and enjoy those days to the fullest! ALL THE TIME, GOD IS GOOD....GOD IS GOOD, ALL THE TIME.

May that encourage you to do the same! Thank God every single day that you are healthy and whole and do not take anything, even being able to walk unassisted, for granted. Since my leg strength was healed, I regularly thank God that I can walk without any help because I know that had He not intervened, I may not be at this point, and I am beyond grateful! I cannot say it enough: TO GOD BE THE GLORY!!!!


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In The Deepest Valley, Do Not Fear

           Have you ever felt like you have gone ten rounds in a boxing match, like Rocky Balboa? Not literally, but figuratively. By that, I mean going through a battle (valley) so intense that it drained everything from within you and all you felt was bloody, bruised, broken and hardly able to stand up anymore. I was at that point throughout all of 2013.

I faced things that I had never faced before in my entire life and to be honest, there were times I was very scared! Although God was gracious and kind enough to prepare me for an entire year beforehand, it was still the most difficult year of my life. I literally would never have made it through the entire year of 2013 without His preparation. I wrote everything down that the Lord had spoken to me during 2012 in preparation for the upcoming battle, so that I would remember everything and be able to refer to my notes when the time came. Although I already knew these things, God reminded me beforehand that my hope is in Him (alone), to praise Him in the midst of the storms, not to fear the unknown, that He still heals today, that it is okay to rest and that He will never let go, even when I find it hard to hang on.

When I faced a diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis as well as several moderate to severe spinal problems in 2013 (which cause a lot of pain some days), along with a short period of depression and some big financial challenges among many other things, I had my weapons ready, so to speak. God never promises us that we will have it easy, but He does promise to be with us and He will prepare us for the battles in our lives. Not only that, He will fight with us and for us! For these reasons, we have hope that everything will turn out right when all is said and done.

Our job through these storms and valleys is to trust God, praise Him and believe and claim that He is there for us and with us! He will take care of the details and He will make something good out of everything bad that happens in our lives when we love and trust Him.

There were two times when I was at the brink of giving up in 2013. Along with physical, emotional and financial battles, I was facing the fiercest spiritual battles of my life. We all know that when we are already down that Satan takes every opportunity to finish the job by trying to get us to believe that things are too hard and that things will never get better. It is easy to forget in the midst of our lowest times that we have the victory because the Lord is on our side! I recalled this verse several times during 2013: “You …are from God and have overcome…because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.” (I John 4:4)

PRAISE GOD that He is with us, even “through the valley of the shadow of death.” I am very thankful that God is stronger than any battle, illness or loss that I face! And, because we (His children) have the victory and He is in control of everything that happens in our lives (and turns what was meant to harm us into something good), we do not have to fear anything that comes against us! As the matter of fact, the Bible says the words, “Fear not” or “Do not fear” 365 times, one for every day of the year!

            Take heart and be encouraged that God is for you, He is your strength in weakness and with God’s help, there is nothing you cannot overcome!

Excerpts taken from Chapters 12 & 13, “Struck Down, But Not Destroyed.” 



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Am I Loved?

Have you ever doubted that you are loved or even loveable? I sure have, many times! It usually comes with the territory when you grow up in an abusive home or if you have been in a bad, loveless marriage. Some of us could write a non-ending list of all the things that we think make us unlovable and then fall into the trap of comparing ourselves unfavorably with everyone else. The great news is, there is nobody else like you; you are a specialized, unique individual created to do great things that nobody else can do!

Our “love worthiness” does not come from other people, even our parents or spouses. You ARE loved because you were created in God’s image…by a God who is love and loves everything about you, imperfections and all!

Some of the things I grew up hating about myself (my stubbornness and strong will, for example) have actually helped me remain very strong through many difficult times in my adult life that would have crushed any normal person. When things got really tough and life kept knocking me down, I got right back up and continued to fight! Sometimes, I ask myself why I am such a glutton for punishment by getting back up after being knocked down over and over.

Now I praise God for creating me exactly the way I am, and giving me an inner strength that has pushed me through some very difficult circumstances! Oh, how I wish I had not wasted so many years trying to be like others because I thought I was unlovable the way I was! I wished somebody had told me growing up that I was wonderful the way God created me and that I should not wish to be somebody else! Not that this means I am perfect, because God continues to tweak me in areas I need to grow yet, to make me an even better “model” than I was originally. It’s a constant growth process that continues until the day we leave this earth.

So, if you too have been plagued by feeling unloved or unlovable for years, remember that God created you with your unique traits for a reason. Of course, some things we need to shed off and improve (for obvious reasons), such as traits like anger, for example, but maybe some of the things you have disliked about yourself may be what actually makes you likeable to others and keeps you going when others would have given up in your situation.

When you find it hard to believe or feel that even God loves you, take it in faith. God's Word says many times how much He loves you; If in doubt, have faith that He loves you because His Word says He loves you.

Some people consider me odd because I think “outside the box” a lot. However, God has used me in some very unique ways (I am a very unique person, after all) and I am thankful. The average Joe could not have ministered to certain people like I have been able to because of this. Instead of fighting against what makes you, “you,” embrace it and allow God to shine through you in a way that only you can shine! If I can do this, then I know that you can too!

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Thrown Stones

"...It has been interesting to watch different people’s reactions when they find out I am divorced. During the six years following my divorce, it was difficult telling people that I am a single parent (divorced) when they first met me and asked about my “husband.” There was a little twinge deep inside of me that was afraid that they too would react negatively and pull away, even though they may not have intended to do that. There were even times during the first five years after my divorce that it felt like I was branded with a scarlet letter..."

            "...I am very grateful, however, that Jesus is full of love, mercy and compassion for the broken! Jesus would really stand out among the majority who have placed themselves in the role of judge, jury and executioner before even knowing what landed a divorced person in that situation. I am also very grateful for the many brothers and sisters in Christ who, like Christ, have chosen to stand out and reach out in love and mercy to those who are going through or have been through a divorce. Jesus said, “As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples (followers), IF you love one another.” John 13:34b-35 (NIV)

            I found great love and comfort in knowing that the Lord Jesus was right by my side the entire time…even throughout the sleepless nights, teary days, and hardest moments. He never let go of my hand, not even for a moment. The same is true for anybody who turns to Him, no matter the situation. He will be right there with you, whether you are alone after divorce, sitting alone in a jail cell, or have just lost someone dear to you..."

"...Allow Him to come in to your life and situation and comfort you through your darkest moments. I promise you, He will not let you down! He will also never make you feel like a second-class citizen because of your past mistakes or when you find yourself in a very difficult, lonely situation. He will not pull away from you when you need Him most or make you feel as if you are wearing a scarlet letter. There is hope, encouragement, and true love waiting just for you if you let Him in to help you and trust in Him to get you through. Isaiah 41:10 says, “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” (NIV)..."

           "...Too many people turn to something else, anything else, but Him to help them cope during a hard situation. For some reason, many people find it easier to turn to alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, sex or any other number of things to help ease their pain. However, they do not realize that those things may help temporarily to numb the pain, but the pain will ALWAYS come back, guaranteed. The Lord, however, will always be your help and will never leave you feeling empty or hopeless, so that you have to turn to something else to “numb the pain away.” I can honestly say through my experience that He can permanently remove the pain if you let Him!"

 

Excerpts taken from Chapter 8, "Struck Down, But Not Destroyed"   
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