Small Acts of Kindness

In a culture such as ours, bigger is better. Bigger value meals, bigger vehicles, bigger homes and bigger “toys.” Due to this, we tend to only notice the big things, whatever those may be. How easily we feel slighted when someone gets something bigger than us or better than us.

However, that there are still a small minority of people out there, who, like me, notice and value the littlest of things. I have been through far too much in my life and done without too many things to overlook the littlest of things. A single flower growing in the middle of the grass, a robin walking across the yard, a small bar of beautiful hand soap from a friend, a card in the mail, clouds in the shapes of every day objects and a skink running across my porch are things I get excited about!

I think that God enjoys it when we look at and take notice of the little things in life! After all, He does! He knows the number of hairs on each of our heads and has names for each star in the heavens! Nothing escapes his notice…not for a minute.

Have you ever noticed how each type of bird has its own distinct chirp? How about the vast number of species of things like bugs and lizards? These things we tend to be too busy to even notice, but God himself notices because He created such a wide variety of things to be enjoyed by us. If we are too busy even to stop and notice the little things, then we are doing too much.

Before my diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis and moderate to severe spinal problems, I confess I was too busy to notice many little things. I had three part time jobs while raising my teenagers alone. About a year before my diagnoses, I started having a lot of neurological problems and issues with pain on some days. I had to gradually begin to slow down and learn that taking it easy was okay to do once in a while. I was running on high-speed like the energizer bunny. It was in the middle of all of this that the Lord started speaking to me, telling me to “rest.” That was a very difficult, if not impossible, request from God to me but I knew that He was telling me to rest for a reason, and I needed to figure out how to go about doing this. Obviously, I had to ask the Lord’s help in this area.

I started pacing myself more and not trying to live up to the supermom ideal I had held myself up to. Then came these physical problems followed by my employer retiring, leaving me with only one part-time job. Instead of stressing about it, however, I chose to use that time to learn to rest more and stop and “smell the roses,” so to speak. I began to notice a lot of little things that I had not even noticed previously and enjoy them too!

I will never forget one time in particular right after my diagnosis of MS, and also the diagnosis of my mom’s Parkinson’s disease as well as a lot of other really difficult situations going on during this time, when one of my kid’s teachers looked at me and said with compassion and kindness in her voice while staring straight at me, “How are you REALLY doing?” At that moment, I teared up a little as I said “Ok, but I have been better.” She then proceeded to say “I think you need a hug” as she proceeded to hug me and just held me for a bit. That was one of the few times in my life where I felt that God really cared about me and loved me the most, and that at least one person on this earth really truly cared about my hurt during this particular time. When I got this news and started sharing it with others, I got a lot of blank stares, little smiles and even silence; many of my “friends” began to disappear when I got this news.

A simple hug. It doesn’t cost anything, words are not even necessary and it only takes a few seconds of your life. Hearing the words “I’ll pray for you” in passing are needed during these times too, but too many people say this without really even meaning it. A hug takes little effort on our part but means a lot to the recipient. Jesus reached out to hurting people by a touch of His hand as well, and I imagine He probably hugged a lot of people too.

As a struggling single mom, I used to have a difficult time feeling that I could make a difference to someone else because I have such limited resources. However, at that moment, I realized that it just takes the little things that are free to give and take very little time on my part, and these things mean the world to someone who is hurting! Even saying a warm “hi” with a smile can make a stranger’s day better.

I recently started a “texting ministry” where I send texts to people I know who are going through a hard time, sending them encouraging verses throughout the week and then praying for them. I have also taken pictures of something I know that a friend may enjoy (of my dog to my dog-loving friends or of a beautiful bird in my yard if I know they love birds) and text it to them. I have also gone to the dollar store and loaded up a small basket of bottled water and snacks to take to people I know who are in the hospital (which is not very often). I spend roughly $10 and deliver it to them. They are so very appreciative and it takes very little time and money to show a little bit of kindness when they need it most. Sending small notes of encouragement to someone I have not talked to in a while also makes a big difference, as I have been on the receiving end of that gesture also.

And then, there is the good, old fashioned stand-by of a simple hug and looking someone in the eye and saying, “How are you really doing?” and waiting for their response as you really hear them out. Taking a meal to a friend who just had an outpatient procedure really makes a big difference as well (it does not matter how small or simple it is) and so does taking a plate of freshly baked cookies to a neighbor.  I think we need to get back to the small acts of kindness and reach out to the hurting around us. There is never a shortage of hurting people, or a shortage of small acts of kindness we can show.

Excerpts taken from Chapter 13, “Struck Down, But Not Destroyed.”