Taken for Granted

We have all been taken for granted at one time or another by those we love and care about. And we too (gulp) have taken those we love for granted. When things in life go smoothly, it is very easy to forget the small things as well as important things and just assume that those we love will be there for us when we need them.

This concept could be carried over to our physical body too, specifically to the small, “insignificant” muscles and joints in our body. When everything is working well, we don’t think anything about them. However, work out at the gym for an hour and see how many muscles and joints you suddenly have that you never knew you had before! Just like our joints and muscles, our friends and family are extremely important in our day-to-day life. But watch what happens when for one reason or other, something in life hits us hard and for one reason or the other, we find ourselves alone. Suddenly, the ones you assumed would always be there may not, for one reason or the other, be there. Now we realize something is not right, or even missing, and we feel every bit of the reality that sometimes we have to learn to stand on our own two feet (with God, of course!). In some cases they choose not to be there, but in other cases, life happens and sometimes they just cannot be there for us.

Do you think the same thing could happen in our relationship with the Lord? When everything is going well, we don’t tend to think of God’s compassion, presence, protection, security and provision like we do when a crisis happens and we are suddenly reminded of all that God really is to us. Do you think this hurts God as much as it hurts us when we are taken for granted by someone we love? I would venture to say yes, that He too is hurt when we think little about Him except in times of need.

Walking with Him and being in His presence is a daily commitment, done from our hearts because we love Him and desire to grow our relationship with Him. Anything of value takes some type of work to keep it going, especially good relationships. However, the cost is always worth it if the relationship is valued. If the relationship is not very important, you are less likely to invest time and energy into it. Our relationship with the Lord needs to be held in highest regard every day, and not something to be tossed aside or ignored unless we need something. Unfortunately, this is what we are doing when we take things (or people or even God) for granted.

Besides taking people for granted, how many times do we take things like sight, smell, taste or pain-free living for granted? The majority of people do not even think about these things. But get a bad head cold and we find out how quickly we miss our sense of smell and taste and complain of the inconvenience. How about instead of complaining of the inconvenience, we give God praise and thank Him for these things that we normally have, which are gifts from Him to enjoy?

I admit, I used to take things such as my spine being fully flexible and pain-free for granted until I developed moderate to severe spinal problems that caused chronic pain that brought me to tears at times. However, since God has done some amazing, dramatic healings in my spine, I have learned not to take these things for granted anymore! On the days where I actually feel no pain at all (which is not very often), I thank God and praise Him for the pain-free days and I am fully aware of how much worse things could have been had He not healed my spine! Although it has been a long, hard road, I am very thankful for the progress that has been made in the past two years!

There was also a time where, around the time I was finally diagnosed with my Multiple Sclerosis (after two years of not knowing what was wrong, having multiple tests run and countless problems ruled out and having progressive difficulties neurologically), I was losing strength in my legs over the period of a few months. I could not stand up at all unless I pulled myself up to my feet by holding onto something or pushing up on the arms of the chair with all the strength in my arms to come to a stand. I had to hold on to the top of the car door and pull myself out of the car with my arms in order to get on my feet. It was getting more difficult to walk and it was beginning to take noticeably longer and take more energy to get from point A to point B.

Being only 42 at the time, I knew this was not normal and not a good thing. Scary, in fact. However, God did a miracle in that situation as well! I fully believe in the power of prayer and anointing to be healed (in which faith plays a vital part) and the very next day after being anointed and prayed over by my pastor, my legs were completely back to normal again! Before this time, I had never thanked God that I could get up and walk normally without even a thought. Truthfully, I never even thought about it before. Now, it is a totally different story because I fully realize that without God’s touch at that moment, I could easily have been reliant on an assistive device to help me walk by now. How I (often) thank God for being able to walk on my own now with absolutely no help!!! I no longer take such a simple thing for granted anymore and am very, very grateful!

I do not know what the future holds and how far or how quickly my MS will progress. However, I know the One who holds the power in His hands to give me the ability to do things I normally would not have been able to do on my own. I fully trust the Hands that have already begun a healing work inside my body and will continue to trust Him for my health, no matter which direction it takes. This is one person who is very thankful for the things I used to take for granted!

God of All Comfort

II Corinthians 1:3-4 says, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in ALL our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.”  (NIV) Do you notice the two words, “so that?” The reason God comforts us in our time of need is so that when somebody else is hurting, we too can comfort them in their time of suffering. Imagine if we were left alone to comfort ourselves in trouble? Or, imagine if we received this comfort from God but hoarded it for ourselves and refused to give it to others when they needed it most?

It seems that those who hurt the most and have been through the most make the best comforters. It does not take long to see who has had a pretty good life with very few, if any, deep valleys along the way by their reaction when you or someone else is hurting. I suppose that is one reason I consider myself blessed for having been through many, many more deep valleys than the vast majority of people. I am very sensitive to the feelings of others, even if they do not let on they are hurting. It makes me quick to ask, “Are you okay?” or “Can I pray for you?”

I believe this could include giving comfort to those hurting from past mistakes, regrets or sins for which they are now paying the consequences. Though it is never right to condone their bad choices or sinful mistakes, we need to be there for those who matter to us. Do we become angry with an “I told you so” attitude or do we just give them a warm hug and say we love them, pray with them and say we will be there for them?

I have a very dear friend whose son has been in prison for six years. She was heartbroken when he got locked up. One of the first things she told me was that, “I did not raise him that way.” The pain she feels from missing out on the past six years with her son, especially around the holidays, her birthday and at Christmas is very apparent. First time offender and did not even get into any trouble as a kid. As a matter of fact, he was a “great kid, easy-going. Could not have asked for a better kid.” However, she has never made excuses for him or what he did to get put in prison though it has still been difficult for her.

When she told me that almost every one of his friends abandoned him when he got locked up, I told her (who is like my very own sister that I wanted and never had) that I would write to him and send him cards on his birthdays and holidays. I had never met him previously in person, but I feel like I have known him for years because of how much my dear friend has talked about him. My heart went out to him, and I felt compassion for someone I had never met who had made some big mistakes along the way and lost his friends because of those mistakes.

I must say that I feel blessed every time I get a letter from him. From his letters, I can tell that in some way I am encouraging him and making a difference in his life. Besides, I have a very captive audience when I send him a long letter that most people would not even take the time to read if I had mailed it to them. I go on and on with things that I am sure would bore most people to tears, but he is always so grateful for every piece of mail he gets. I have never been in his situation, but I can still reach out in compassion and try to comfort him in a very dark place in his life as one who has received much comfort from God in my dark places. If this draws him closer to the Lord and helps him get through another day, then my letter writing “ministry” was well worth every stroke of the pen.

This is not something I recommend that everyone do, as you can potentially place yourself in a dangerous situation. However, when it is a dear friend who has been there for you and has been like a big sister to you, then you just need to do those things for them. Compassion is a lost art that needs to be brought back again!

I grew up in a home where there was NO compassion and comfort shown. However, I learned this form of art even though I went through a very, very difficult childhood because GOD was my comfort, and in turn, I have been able to comfort and be compassionate towards the hurting by His example to me.

I never met anyone who has changed the world for the better by being uncaring towards the hurting but I have met many people who have changed the world, or at least their corner of the world, by being a comfort to the hurting. Will you change your corner of the world by showing compassion and being a comfort to someone else who needs it, even a stranger? We can bring back the lost art of compassion (and comfort) simply by sharing with others what God has first shown us in our time of need.

Change your part of the world, one person at a time!

Taken from Chapter 10, “Hope Found Amidst a ‘Hopeless’ Situation,” Struck Down, But Not Destroyed

Small Acts of Kindness

In a culture such as ours, bigger is better. Bigger value meals, bigger vehicles, bigger homes and bigger “toys.” Due to this, we tend to only notice the big things, whatever those may be. How easily we feel slighted when someone gets something bigger than us or better than us.

However, that there are still a small minority of people out there, who, like me, notice and value the littlest of things. I have been through far too much in my life and done without too many things to overlook the littlest of things. A single flower growing in the middle of the grass, a robin walking across the yard, a small bar of beautiful hand soap from a friend, a card in the mail, clouds in the shapes of every day objects and a skink running across my porch are things I get excited about!

I think that God enjoys it when we look at and take notice of the little things in life! After all, He does! He knows the number of hairs on each of our heads and has names for each star in the heavens! Nothing escapes his notice…not for a minute.

Have you ever noticed how each type of bird has its own distinct chirp? How about the vast number of species of things like bugs and lizards? These things we tend to be too busy to even notice, but God himself notices because He created such a wide variety of things to be enjoyed by us. If we are too busy even to stop and notice the little things, then we are doing too much.

Before my diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis and moderate to severe spinal problems, I confess I was too busy to notice many little things. I had three part time jobs while raising my teenagers alone. About a year before my diagnoses, I started having a lot of neurological problems and issues with pain on some days. I had to gradually begin to slow down and learn that taking it easy was okay to do once in a while. I was running on high-speed like the energizer bunny. It was in the middle of all of this that the Lord started speaking to me, telling me to “rest.” That was a very difficult, if not impossible, request from God to me but I knew that He was telling me to rest for a reason, and I needed to figure out how to go about doing this. Obviously, I had to ask the Lord’s help in this area.

I started pacing myself more and not trying to live up to the supermom ideal I had held myself up to. Then came these physical problems followed by my employer retiring, leaving me with only one part-time job. Instead of stressing about it, however, I chose to use that time to learn to rest more and stop and “smell the roses,” so to speak. I began to notice a lot of little things that I had not even noticed previously and enjoy them too!

I will never forget one time in particular right after my diagnosis of MS, and also the diagnosis of my mom’s Parkinson’s disease as well as a lot of other really difficult situations going on during this time, when one of my kid’s teachers looked at me and said with compassion and kindness in her voice while staring straight at me, “How are you REALLY doing?” At that moment, I teared up a little as I said “Ok, but I have been better.” She then proceeded to say “I think you need a hug” as she proceeded to hug me and just held me for a bit. That was one of the few times in my life where I felt that God really cared about me and loved me the most, and that at least one person on this earth really truly cared about my hurt during this particular time. When I got this news and started sharing it with others, I got a lot of blank stares, little smiles and even silence; many of my “friends” began to disappear when I got this news.

A simple hug. It doesn’t cost anything, words are not even necessary and it only takes a few seconds of your life. Hearing the words “I’ll pray for you” in passing are needed during these times too, but too many people say this without really even meaning it. A hug takes little effort on our part but means a lot to the recipient. Jesus reached out to hurting people by a touch of His hand as well, and I imagine He probably hugged a lot of people too.

As a struggling single mom, I used to have a difficult time feeling that I could make a difference to someone else because I have such limited resources. However, at that moment, I realized that it just takes the little things that are free to give and take very little time on my part, and these things mean the world to someone who is hurting! Even saying a warm “hi” with a smile can make a stranger’s day better.

I recently started a “texting ministry” where I send texts to people I know who are going through a hard time, sending them encouraging verses throughout the week and then praying for them. I have also taken pictures of something I know that a friend may enjoy (of my dog to my dog-loving friends or of a beautiful bird in my yard if I know they love birds) and text it to them. I have also gone to the dollar store and loaded up a small basket of bottled water and snacks to take to people I know who are in the hospital (which is not very often). I spend roughly $10 and deliver it to them. They are so very appreciative and it takes very little time and money to show a little bit of kindness when they need it most. Sending small notes of encouragement to someone I have not talked to in a while also makes a big difference, as I have been on the receiving end of that gesture also.

And then, there is the good, old fashioned stand-by of a simple hug and looking someone in the eye and saying, “How are you really doing?” and waiting for their response as you really hear them out. Taking a meal to a friend who just had an outpatient procedure really makes a big difference as well (it does not matter how small or simple it is) and so does taking a plate of freshly baked cookies to a neighbor.  I think we need to get back to the small acts of kindness and reach out to the hurting around us. There is never a shortage of hurting people, or a shortage of small acts of kindness we can show.

Excerpts taken from Chapter 13, “Struck Down, But Not Destroyed.”

 

A Spirit of Power, Love and a Sound Mind

My favorite verse, II Timothy 1:7, says that “God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, of love and of a sound mind.”

Fear comes from the enemy. It says 365 times in the Bible not to fear…one for every day of the year! And, because God did not give us this spirit, it comes from our enemy, Satan, who uses fear to try to stop us from doing many things, including living to the fullest of our potential. If we fear rejection, for example, then we may shrink back from praying with strangers, inviting them to church, telling them about the Lord or even what He has done in our lives. Or, if we fear failure (as I do), then we may be too scared to use our God-given gifts in fear of adding one more failure to our long list of previous failures. (Guilty!) Why bother anymore, we may ask. These are only a few examples of hundreds of things that fear drives us to do…or not do.

However, because we are “from God and have overcome…the one who is in me is GREATER than the one who is in the world” (I John 4:4). Therefore, in reality, the spirit of power, of love and of a sound mind is much greater than the spirit of fear, as they come from God whereas fear comes from the enemy (to try to destroy us).

One of the many things that the spirit of power enables us to do is face each day with strength. We have power to stand on, because God backs us up with this power. We have the power to overcome illness, loss and other devastations that life can throw our way. Have you ever wondered how someone can suffer with things like cancer, death of loved ones, job loss and financial struggle and still have joy in their heart and strength that keeps them going? It is only though the power that God gives that person to overcome in the midst of great difficulty. I have had members of my own family ask me how I can still be smiling and happy (full of joy) when I have been through so much in my life, far more than the average person. All I can do is point toward heaven and say “it’s only because God gives me the strength, peace and joy to do so.” I can tell you for certain it is NOT ONLY because I am a really strong person, but because in my weakness, God’s strength is more present and obvious in my life. When we handle life’s difficulties well, others take notice and it speaks volumes about our faith in God and His strength in our lives.

The spirit of love motivates us to love others, even when they are not lovely. We are able to love the coworker who is rude, angry or seems to enjoy ignoring or mistreating you. It may be really hard to do, especially in our own strength, but when we pray for God to help us to see others as He sees them and ask Him to help us love that person, He will do it! This spirit of love will supersede what we may feel like doing, like scratching a rude, snappy co-worker’s eyes out, for example! How many times I have had to hold my tongue from responding not out of love, but out of the flesh.  But, the results are always worth it! Case in point…I had one co-worker with whom I worked with for two years. Almost every day, she came in with a much less than desirable attitude and either completely ignored me or would say something snide to me. She was one of those who enjoyed seeing someone get in trouble and would laugh about it behind your back. Anyway, she was one of those that was much easier to avoid than talk to. I would rather have had a root canal than have to ask her something work-related because of the attitude I always got.

However, after my book came out, I posted a picture of it in the break room in case someone wanted a copy. She overheard me talking about it being a collection of my personal testimonies and said, “I have a testimonial.” I just about fell out of my chair because I could not believe she would have something like that to say. It would have been easy to overlook what she said and not respond. However, I said “Why don’t you tell me about it? I would love to hear what your testimony is!” She proceeded to tell me about a time where she was literally at death’s door and God intervened and did a miracle and she survived, to which I responded, “Wow! That’s great! I’ll bet you thank God every day for doing that for you! That is awesome! Thanks for sharing that with me!” From that point on, she was a TOTALLY different person. She actually started talking to me after that and her attitude did a 180 degree turn, at least towards me personally. I think she just needed to know someone cared and showing just a little bit of love towards her totally changed her attitude from that day on, praise God!

The spirit of a sound mind allows us to remain calm when everything around us seems to be falling apart and going crazy. The Lord helps us to remain focused, disciplined and even-keeled during these times. We do not have to go off the deep end when our world comes crashing down, because God gives us a spirit of a sound mind. Some versions of the Bible say “spirit of self-discipline.” This spirit allows us to remain under control when things in life are out of control, or even to resist that extra piece of cake you want, but do not need. It also helps us to become more disciplined in spending time with the Lord daily when so many things fight for our time and attention, for example. It takes self-discipline to grow any relationship, and that includes our relationship with the Lord. So many things can get us off track (even good things can), but He can help keep us, or get us back on, track and keep us there.

So remember…do not fear, because God gives us so much more! J

 

Green Pastures Part V, "...goodness and mercy"

Ending my series on the 23^rd Psalm, verse 6 states, “Surely goodness and love (mercy) will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.” On earth, it sometimes feels that goodness and love are hard to find, at least in my life. However, we need to keep our focus off of what is going on around us, which is meant to hold us down, and keep our focus on what is good and right in our world, Jesus Christ!

It is so easy to lose sight of the goodness and mercy that God promises will follow me (when I am living for Him). If Satan can keep our eyes on the discouraging circumstances and bad things going on around us in the world these days, we can completely forget God’s goodness and mercy in our lives. Besides staying in God’s Word every day and standing on His promises, we also need to write down a list of all the ways God has shown His goodness in our lives; from His protection, our family, the roof over our head, meals on the table each day, our churches, His provision and even our pets! Just the fact that I can walk, see and hear is God’s goodness and mercy in my life (especially when two and a half years ago, I was having progressive difficulty walking, which God miraculously healed!!) Then when circumstances give us “amnesia” for all of God’s goodness and mercy in our lives, we have a reminder of what God has done for us!

Although the fact is that things are very difficult in this life, we also have the promise that we will dwell in the house of the Lord forever (heaven). What an amazing promise to look forward to! The memories of this earth will one day be a distant memory. What we do on earth prepares us for the life ahead, and we need to make the most of them! How are we showing others the truth of God’s goodness and mercy? Are we telling others, believers and non-believers, about the goodness and love of God? Are we living an example of that goodness and mercy to others by reaching out to them, loving them and showing them goodness, which is getting more and more rare in our world these days? Let your light shine before men, that they may see and believe in Him and know that there is hope for them too!

We are running the most difficult marathon ever run, called the race of life, that sometimes seems to be never ending. However, when we keep our eyes on the finish line, in which we will dwell in the house of the Lord forever, we are encouraged to keep on going towards the finish line. I encourage you to keep running this race, because even though life is very difficult, God is right there with us, following us with His goodness and mercy, even though it may be hard to see sometimes. Even if you have experienced a life similar to mine where it seems like all that follows you is difficulty and more difficulty, take heart knowing that it is not all in vain when you live for Christ! There is a great ending to this story of life…heaven!

As I Corinthians 9:25 says, “Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.” Praise God that we will dwell in His house forever!! Who wants to go running with me for the greatest prize ever known?

 

 

Green Pastures, Part IV

Continuing with verse 4 of chapter 23, David says, “…your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” When we think of a rod, we tend to think of something used for correction, such as “the rod of discipline” with regards to our children (Proverbs 22:15). But on closer look, the rod mentioned here refers to a rod of protection (from the enemy) and the staff is used to guide us with care. Like a good shepherd does for his sheep (who are utterly helpless and defenseless with a shepherd to protect and guide them), we too would have the same fate without our shepherd, the Lord, who uses his rod to protect us and his staff to carefully and lovingly guide us. This continues with the theme throughout this chapter, one of comfort and rest in green pastures.

When we know we are protected and guided by our sweet Lord, we can relax without having to feel anxious, scared and worried that any number of dangerous things are right around the corner, ready to hurt us (especially from our unseen enemy!) We can live freely (although we still have to use the brains he gave us to avoid doing something stupid or unnecessarily dangerous), knowing that God is protecting us no matter where we live. I live in a suburb of one of the most dangerous cities in the US and every day I hear about shootings, robberies, murders, etc. It would be very easy to go out, as a single woman, and walk around petrified with fear that I might be the next victim. But, I can hold my head high with confidence that the God of the universe has his angels around me, keeping me safe. Not only this, but He also protects me from my #1 enemy, Satan.

Countless times, I have been in potentially dangerous or even deadly situations, and I have been kept safe. There was a period of about a year where my (ex) husband became physically abusive and one time had his hands around my neck and tried to choke me. I had just learned some self-defense techniques shortly before that, and was equipped to get his hands off from my neck before I was harmed. I always have this deep down assurance that God is protecting my every step.

Recently, God supernaturally protected my 17-year-old son, who took out my car out to go a mile down the road to the grocery. When he went to turn left, there was a fire truck RIGHT THERE, coming full speed towards him and just feet away from my car. (It was blocked from a long line of trucks and big cars). He thought quickly and gunned the engine to get out of the way (towards a ditch straight ahead), then had to quickly brake to avoid going into a deep ravine. The car rested right between a telephone pole and a guardrail. Cars were everywhere at this busy intersection. When my son got home, he said that he was scared out of his mind, and that there was ABSOLUTELY no way (it was impossible that) he should not have been hit by something! There was not even a scratch on the car! It was then I teared up and told him that just that week on Wednesday night, my pastor prayed over us in the chapel meeting for special protection for us and our children. The moment he prayed that, I had a strong feeling that something was going to happen in our household soon but that God was going to supernaturally protect us.  

These are a few examples of God’s rod of protection in action, and I praise God! His rod also protects us from Satan, our enemy, who is always looking for someone to destroy and devour. Satan is powerful but God’s rod far outweighs any measly power that Satan has! As dangerous as our world is and some of the people in it, our struggle is not really against flesh and blood, but against the powers of darkness (Ephesians 6:12). How thankful I am for the Lord’s rod of protection, not only against potential danger or things we can see, but even against things that are unseen coming against us!

Now I move on to the staff of guidance. How many times I have needed God’s guidance in raising my children alone! Having so many decisions to make sometimes overwhelms me, but I am comforted in the fact that God will carefully guide me when I ask Him to. Even with the small decisions, I ask God for His guidance to make the right decision as I carefully weigh the options, as some decisions could have a long-lasting impact on this family. God always gives me peace about the right decision, and no peace about the wrong decision, which guides me to make the right decision.

A few years ago, I had to make a decision to get a spinal tap to diagnose several neurological problems I had for two years that were increasing. At first, I told the doctor “No way! I am not getting that done” (I hated the thought of a huge needle going in next to my spine!) However, she gave me a few weeks to think about it and let her know at my next appointment. Long story short, I prayed that God would give me guidance on what to do. He knew what was wrong with me physically and whether in fact I really needed that particular test done to find out the cause. Within 24 hours, I was overwhelmed with peace about the procedure and had it performed about a month later. As a result, the problem was confirmed (along with the MRI showing lesions on my brain): Multiple Sclerosis.

After a firm diagnosis, it gave me a peace of mind knowing what the problem was so I could move on forward and begin to treat and prepare for this accordingly. It was much, much harder not knowing why I had suffered so many neurological problems. I was also now able to enlist my prayer warrior friends to pray for me accordingly as well as being able to pray for this specifically myself.

I am very thankful for the rest (in green pastures) that the Lord brings to me through His rod of protection and His staff of guidance! Have you thanked God for these things today?

Green Pastures, Part III

Verse 4a of the 23^rd Psalm states, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me…” This portion of verse four leaves no room for gray areas. It does not say “if I walk through,” but, “even though I walk through.” Life in an imperfect world is a guaranteed recipe for valleys to come our way; abuse, depression, war, angry people, unemployment, anxiety, financial struggle, divorce, illness, racism…I could go on and on. Again, God never promised we would not face these valleys but he did promise that He is with us, so for this reason, I have nothing to fear.

And, in spite of those things we can still fear no evil because He, the almighty God, creator of heaven and earth is with us personally. In 2012, the Lord was preparing me for the biggest battle in my life, the hardest year of my life, which took place in 2013. He specifically told me the words, “do not fear the unknown.”*

I was coming into a season in my life where I was being prepared again and again for a big trial coming up and I must admit that I was fearful of what this was going to mean for my life. What would I lose? What would happen? Would my kids be okay? Would something happen to completely turn my world upside down? In the midst of all of these difficult questions, and because I knew he was preparing me for a very difficult season in life, all I could do was ask God to help me have the strength, courage and fearlessness I would need to make it through whatever was coming.* The same can be said for anyone going through a difficult valley. We all need the shepherd’s help, and he freely offers it to us, even when “we walk through the valley of the shadow of death…”

Including Psalm 23:4, there are 365 times in the Bible where it says “fear not” or “do not fear,” one for every day of the year! Although I did fear what was to come in 2013, I also had confidence knowing that God would be right there with me through it. Looking back, I did go through the “valley of the shadow of death” in 2013. I would not wish what I went through on anyone, even an enemy. However, in the midst of all the loss I faced along with the illness, financial loss and plethora of friends I thought I had before then who decided to scatter when I was facing the lowest valley in my life, God stuck with me.

However, I did not feel his presence the way I normally do nor did he speak as clearly as I am accustomed to hearing him speak, but I believe he was trying to develop my faith to a greater degree. Was I still going to believe he was there with me when I did not feel him or hear from him at all through the hardest points of 2013? It’s one thing to believe in Psalm 23:4 when things are going okay and God is clearly speaking to you, but how about the times when the rug has been pulled out from under you and you cannot feel God around anywhere? What then? Some of us must come to the point in our struggles and say, “either what God’s Word says about His faithfulness is true, or it’s not.” This is not based on feeling, but on truth.

So, if you are facing a period of depression and/or loss as I did in 2013 or other dark valley and feel that life cannot possibly get worse, step out in faith and hold onto the TRUTH (even if you cannot feel it). God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. Valleys are temporary, but God’s faithfulness in permanent. TRUTH never changes, no matter how we feel. Emotions and feelings of hopelessness, feeling worthless, and unimportant to anyone are lies from the enemy meant to keep you from believing the truth!

Emotions can change in a matter of moments and can leave you feeling defeated enough to give up. There were two times specifically that I was on the verge of completely giving up on life in 2013, but God intervened in some way to keep me going just one more minute, then one more hour, then one more day and then one more week…until I came out on the other side, stronger than ever before! Thank you Lord, that I have nothing to fear, because even in “the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for (BECAUSE) you are with me!”

*Some content taken from excerpts of Chapter 12 of my book, “Struck Down, But Not Destroyed.” (June 2014, Crossbooks publishing)

Green Pastures, Part II

Picking back up again in Psalm 23, we come to verse 3, a continuation of the perfect picture of rest that verses 1 & 2 speak of. Verse 3 states, “…he restores my soul.” When we rest in Him, He gently “restores our soul,” our very being. When we are running around busily trying to survive the daily “rat race,” it is impossible to feel restored. Only when we quietly rest our minds and bodies, reflecting on who He is can we “recharge” so that we can accomplish the task He put us on earth to do.

The same time the Lord told me back in 2012 to rest, I was working three part time jobs as a single parent. Two of the jobs were quite demanding; the other job was more relaxing and repetitive, being much easier work. I always felt like I was going high speed and when I got home each night, fixed dinner, cleaned up, did laundry, assisted with homework, washed dishes, spent some time with the boys and did my devotions, I practically poured myself into bed, exhausted. During the day, however, I felt like Superwoman and enjoyed the fact I got so much accomplished every day.

The three jobs went on for 3-1/2 years until the doctor I worked for retired. Perfect timing, I believe, because the Lord knew I could not keep going at that pace much longer. Even when I lost two of these three jobs due to his retirement (the job I was left with was only p.r.n., as needed, with no guarantee of hours), I still found it hard to rest although circumstances made it much easier now, so I asked the Lord to help me rest. It was eight long months before I found another steady job with guaranteed hours. Even then, my hours were cut from about 45 a week to 30 a week and I had to take a huge pay cut. While I complained at first about the lack of hours and fretted about how I was possibly going to pay my living expenses on such a huge decrease in pay, I was beginning to feel more rested. I literally felt like God was restoring me physically and emotionally from the inside out and after a while, I learned to enjoy where the Lord had me although underemployed with a significant drop in pay.

He began a series of physical healings in my body over the next two years, as I worked this one 30-hour-a-week job. First it was problems with quickly progressing weakness in my legs, then some moderate to severe spinal problems (that caused extreme stiffness and moderate to severe chronic pain) that he healed instantly and miraculously. Then He healed my chronic asthma, leaving me no longer dependent on my asthma medication and twice daily inhaler! Although I still have Multiple Sclerosis and not all of my spine problems are gone, I feel much better than it did two years ago! Not only has he restored my soul of the weariness and heaviness that came with running the “rat race,” He has begun to restore my body as well! There is nobody else on earth who can do this permanently like He can. Praise Jehova Roi (My shepherd, the God who sees)!

Green Pastures, Part I

If we are not careful, it is very easy to get wrapped up in the worries and stresses of life. Anxiety and depression are at an all-time high. Our society thrives on the mindset of squeezing as many activities as possible into every single day to make life “better.” Got to have the kids in every activity and then some to keep them busy. All it ends up doing, however, is stressing them out, stressing you and your family out and prevents you from forming meaningful relationships with neighbors and friends. There is great cost to running the “rat race” day in and day out, one of which is disconnect to others in our society.

Go back 30 years or so to when I was growing up, and we were home almost every night, together. However, we worked very, very hard doing chores inside and out. At the crack of dawn on Saturdays, we were pulled out of bed to start working again. Activities outside the home were somewhat limited, but we would on occasion visit with neighbors and our extended family, most of whom lived within 15 minutes of our house. The world did not revolve around dance classes, gymnastics, sports and the like. Work, work, work was the mantra of our day.

The most important thing to remember in every area of life is moderation. Although activities can teach some important skills as can working hard to help the family out, these too need to be done in moderation. Rest was God’s idea. He even rested on the seventh day from creating the entire universe and everything in it! If He did it, then we should too!

Growing up in that kind of environment made it nearly impossible for me to learn how to rest, and have fun with my friends and family. Especially when I became a single mom, where there was always too much to do and not enough time. Rest? Lay down? Chill in the pool with the kids? Who had time for that?

In 2012, after 42 years of living ragged like this, my body could not handle it anymore. I had the left side of my body go limp and I started to get a lot of numbness and tingling in my arms and legs. When I called the doctor, her office told me it sounded like I may have had a mini stroke. Testing came out negative for that, but that was the beginning of a wakeup call. Then, the Lord told me very specifically in 2013 that it’s “okay to rest. You need to rest your body and rest in me.” Talk about a huge request from God! However, I knew that He was asking me to do this for a reason, so I asked Him to help me do this as it was nearly impossible for me to do this on my own, having grown up with “work, work, work” alone being ingrained into my very being. I learned a strong work ethic and our house looked spotless inside and out, but it also made it hard to do what even God Himself did on the seventh day, rest.

Psalm 23:1-2 speaks of rest. When our focus turns to Him daily in the midst of the busyness of life, we immediately feel rested and are at peace, no matter what is going on in our lives. Nothing else can bring the amazing peace and rest that only He brings. THE LORD “is my shepherd, I shall not be in want” (vs 1) of anything! When we meditate on this, we are completely at rest, knowing that no matter what we are facing, we will not be in want, because HE is our shepherd. “He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters…” (vs 2). What an ultimate picture of rest! Close your eyes and picture yourself lying in a green pasture. What do you see and feel? Green pastures are vivid with the colors of the flowers, the big, beautiful blue sky and thick green grass, soft, cool and comforting to the touch.

Notice that verse 2 does not say that “he hopes or wants that I lie down in green pastures (a picture of perfect rest).” It says that he “makes me lie down in green pastures.” Occasional rest is just what the ultimate “doctor” ordered. If we cannot do this on our own, sometimes God allows situations to come into our lives to reset our priorities and make us rest. In my case, my health took a turn for the worse and I am still battling health difficulties, but I have learned through this that it is ok to occasionally rest my body.

 Then he says that he “leads me (gently) beside quiet waters,” not “leads me hurriedly beside rushing waters.” Another perfect picture of rest with our precious Lord. When we learn to do this, it becomes our favorite, and most rewarding, part of the day! I would take one solid quiet hour with Him over a whole day doing anything else! Won’t you join me in spending at the very least one hour a day in His presence, resting in Him, talking with Him and meditating on His Word? J

Facing Your Demons

I grew up in a very abusive home, and along with that came a feeling of constant unrest in my home growing up. There was always a heavy cloud of fear, unrest and even a hint of a scary, or demonic, presence that seemed to lurk in the background. I was terrified of the dark and remember covering up my entire head at night just so I could get to sleep, only leaving my nose out to breathe. Every night, my heart pounded after I turned off the lights, as if I were expecting something to attack me after the lights went out. When I was about 12 years old, I remember having a dream that I was the victim in a satanic ritual. It was terrifying and woke me up out of a deep sleep.

Many nights I spent praying for God to protect me and help me not feel this intense fear that seemed to take over when the sun went down every night. I remember my mom would look in at me through the crack in the door after she had thought I fell asleep and stare at me for what seemed like a very long time. I always feared what she was thinking about. Was she angry at me about something? Was she waiting for just the right moment to come in and harm me? She never did anything, but I always kept one eye open and watched her back, so I could be ready if something did happen.

My faith was strong as a child and I loved going to church; I also had amazing Godly relatives who were a source of light and strength for me. I have no doubt that God had his protective hand on me throughout my childhood. Not only was there the physical, emotional and verbal abuse I had to endure day after day for 18 years, but also the feeling that something resembling the demonic was living in that home as well. However, the good news in situations like this is that we have a promise in the Word of God that says in I John 4:4, “You…are from God and have overcome…because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.” (NIV)

Rest in God, trusting Him and knowing that He will protect you in danger and help you overcome anything that happens to you. Not only that, He will use what others meant for bad and turn it into good. Of course, it took a long time to get through the effects of the abuse and it required that I forgive my parents so that I could move on and open myself up to let God restore me and rise about my abuse. I am an overcomer…how about you?